Well the time has come.
I have waited two years for the toddler stories and I am so thrilled (really, Sarah?) to have some to tell!!!
#1: The Puzzle
Jackson has this animal puzzle that seemed like a good idea (My mom bought it and I was so excited! I knew Jackson would love it!) but it’s a puzzle that has the little red knobs on the top of each piece so that you can pick them up out of their cut-out spot. It also has a sensor so it makes noises when you find each spot for the puzzle pieces.
If you put a pig in it’s spot, it makes a pig sound. A cat makes a cat sound, etc. Well apparently it’s also light sensitive. But here’s the thing: JUST the pig. So EVERY NIGHT…
…when I turn out the lights, the pig goes insane. Here’s a video I recorded so you can see what I mean:
And now I have a Pavlov’s Dog response to turning out the lights. 😐
On top of that, one day while Jackson was chillin, watching something, I didn’t see one of those stupid puzzle pieces and I stepped on it. I was barefoot. Needless to say, the sounds coming out of my mouth were loud and angry. Jackson looks at me like, “um. mom? you okay there?” and I was all happy mom again and was like “oh hey buddy its okay! mommy just stepped on something.” 😤
Yeah. It hurt to step on it, my goodness. I’m SO thankful for the Melissa and Doug puzzle pieces. Click on the link and you’ll see how they just make them with really thick pieces that stick out of their slots. No need for nubs of death…
#2 The Wasp
So this one is short and simple:
I was swinging on our patio swing and apparently a wasp had crawled under my foot (before I stepped on him… or almost stepped on him?). I had seen him flying around earlier but left him alone (yep! this is the thanks I get. Most people would’ve tried to kill you, dumb dumb.)
Anyways, so either I stepped on it or maybe I scared it and it stung me on the bottom of my foot. WOW. That. HURT!! I don’t know if they all hurt like that or if it maybe happened to sting a nerve or a tendon but I was dying. It sent goosebumps up my right leg (but not my left. Weird. Logical, but weird. ). I looked up what to do – wash it with soap and water, apply calamine lotion and a bandaid so it won’t itch – and when I tried to go inside to do this – LIMPING! Almost calling Eric up out of his piano lessons to help me – I told Jackson to come inside and he threw a FIT! Would you know that boy did not care one BIT that I was in pain?! Thanks, dude. I actually had to drag his butt in the house because I was hurting so much still and needed to get in and sit down.
You. Little. Turd.
#3 The Funny Bone
Today, I hit my funny bone two times in a row and the 2nd time, I got so mad (plus it hurt) so I just yelled and my yell got louder and angrier to the point where Jackson got startled and looked up at me like “holy crap what is your problem?!” but i realized that he wasn’t sure if I was playing or not (there was a hint of a smile on his face. Was he laughing at me?!) . My angry yelling just HAPPENED to sound like one of my play noises (is that good or bad? lol) so I T-O-T-A-L-L-Y covered my tracks, started tickling him, and made my yell sound. 🤣😅
This is either a #momwins or a #momfails moment.
Never did I imagine that having a kid would make me question how many personalities I could indeed manifest at any given moment.
#4 The Punch
Jackson TOTALLY punched me in the eye today while he slept. I was rocking him and he had fallen asleep but I hadn’t put him down yet. This kid swung his arm from BEHIND HIS BACK and freaking NAILED me in the eye. It was so hard I looked to see if he was actually awake (does that mean I think he intentionally punched me? hahaha)
#5 The Target Shopping Cart
Oh gosh so Eric took Jackson to Target last night. He LOVES to push the carts. Which is really frustrating sometimes because he’s so incredibly slow lol (but we let him because YOLO).
So, long story short, Eric put the cart away at the end and Jackson starts getting really upset and starting to panic. (I miss the days when not getting to push the shopping cart anymore induces such panic. Get ready, kid. Life is comin’ for ya.)
He was saying “ma ma…. ma ma … MA MA …MA MA!” over and over again in a sad, panicky voice – that’s his current way of really wanting something and trying to ask nicely – until they started to walk away and then he THREW DOWN.
Eric said as they were walking out and were in the middle area of the double sliding doors, he last-ditch-effort tries to FLING himself back into the store (while wailing, of course). In his effort, he managed to instead throw his face into the glass of the Target automatic door to which then he cried even harder. I felt sorry for him but mostly “thats what you get” when I heard what happened haha 🤣🤣 #toddlermom
I was feeding Jackson some yogurt and there was a glob in the corner of his mouth. I took the spoon I was using and tried to scoop up the extra yogurt. As I tried, I sat there thinking, “Has anyone else had the hilarious pleasure of trying to scrape food off their child’s face – using a spoon – while their mouth frantically tries to chase and then devour it?!”
Have you ever held a treat above a dog’s face and moved it all around, letting them try and grab it? It’s like that.
Thanks, lovelies. Hope you enjoyed 😉